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Put on your Yarmulke
Here comes Chanukah!
Get out the Vodka
To celebrate Chanukah!
Get out your dreidel, every single Jew
For eight days we celebrate, not just one or two.
When you feel like the only kid in town
Without a Santa Claus
Here’s a list of people who are Jewish, please give them your applause.
Billy Joel, lights the menorah
Charleton Heston doesn’t, even though he got the Torah (the 10 commandments)
Barbara Streisand went to Yeshiva
And starred as Yentl
We even had an Orthodox Jew
Mission Impossible’s Steven Hill (Solomon Krakovsky)
Harry Houdini’s name
Was really Eric Weiss
Jewish gold medalist, Sarah Hughs (half Jewish)
Outskated Michelle Kwan on the ice
You can spin the dreidel with Mayor Mike and Senator Chuck
Just watch out for Mayor Mike, he might take away your buck
Put on your yarmulke
It’s time for Chanukah
“That woman” Monica
Celebrates Chanukah
Michael Jackson’s not a Jew, despite 12 nose jobs
Wynona Ryder is, but forgot the 8th commandment
Thou shall not steal or rob
Monica Lewinsky’s, a Jewish American princess
But not that goy Bill, he doesn’t even like latkes or blintzes
Simon and Garfunkel, Jerry Seinfeld, the Marx Brothers
Groucho Harpo Chico, Zeppo and the others
So get out your harmonica
And sing the songs of Chanukah
I hope you get a Konica
On this lovely Chanukah
Just light your menorake
You don’t need all that electronica
Just have some funnaka
Have a happy, happy, happy Chanukah!
Happy Chanukah!
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