One Sabbath, at the end of the service, Rabbi Cohen announces to his Hendon congregation that he would not be renewing his contract and that he would be moving on to a larger synagogue in the West End for more money.  There is immediate silence. He is a popular Rabbi and most of the congregation (but not all – after all he's a Rabbi) are unhappy to hear this news.

Suddenly Moshe, who owns several very successful kosher restaurants, gets up and shouts out,  “If Rabbi Cohen agrees to stay with us, I'll provide him and his family with a free 3 course meal every day for the next 2 years.”

Then Abe, a successful property tycoon, stands up and shouts, “If Rabbi Cohen stays, I'll not only increase his salary by 50% but I'll also guarantee the education of his two children.”

Then Sadie, aged 75, stands up and shouts, “And if Rabbi Cohen stays, I'll promise him sex.”
Rabbi Cohen, blushing, asks her, “Sadie, why on earth did you say that?”
Sadie replies, “Because I've just asked my husband how we could help and he said, “Screw him.”