The Holy Land (2003)
by isaac galena 

Israel is schizophrenic. It’s religious, it’s secular, it’s violent, it’s Jewish. Following the old joke, for every two Jews there are three opinions. It’s a spiritual utopia to some, and a miserable prison to others. Huh? Miserable prison? That can’t be the Israel I know and love. What about the beauty, the spiritual, the falafel, the hot soldiers, the exchange rates at the Kent Stand? You can’t be serious. But I am. And although it may sound strange, anyone who has spent time in Israel after hours, already knows there is a dark side of Jerusalem, one festering with drugs, alcohol, immorality and personal demons. It is this Israel that the new treif indie flick Holy Land attempts to bring out of the closet, on to the big screen, and unfortunately through the mud as well.

Now, before you close your eyes, realize this: The writer director, Eitan Gorlin, is an insider. He’s been through the real J-system:HAGWSH, Yeshiva of Greater Washington, All boys camps, Shalvim, Machal and even spent a year in Muss dorms at Yeshiva University. So the movie's characters are as realistic as possible. They pronounce the CHHH, say “Bli Neder”, and drink at Mike’s Place. But also realize, Gorlin is no longer part of that world, he is no longer orthodox, and when I asked him about his orthodox childhood he said he felt that there were times “that Orthodox Judasim felt like a yoke.” It is this duality that captures meticulous religious detail to a T, and on the other hand, taints the film with a clear element of detest towards orthodoxy, religious dogmas, and the creeds that most religious Jews consider sacred.

With this in mind the story line comes as no surprise: Yeshiva bochur falls in love with a prostitute. Oy Veh.

A nebishy yeshiva student Mendy (Oren Rehany),a US born son of a rabbi, in Bnei Brak, who is apathetic to his religious studies and bored of his spiritual surroundings. The first scene we meet Mendy masturbating to a magazine ad, while his parents are preparing for Shabbat. He is irritable, annoying, listless and so accurately depicted, you will be squirming in your seat. Gorlin captured the definitive yeshiva putz. (or in yeshivish lingo: “the bum.”) Oren Rehany could not have played this part any better. His mixture of English and Hebrew, yiddishe intonations and naïve uncultured awkwardness, makes him virtually impossible to like. With a ridiculous recommendation from his rabbi, Rav Shmuel, quoting the infamous “insatiable urges” Talmudic passage, Mendy is told to “clear his mind” by visiting a prostitute in the red light district of Tel Aviv. It is absurd, and sheds the dark glimpse on Gorlin’s feelings toward the superficiality of what he calls “secluded Eastern European Judaism.”

There Mendy meets the young Christian Russian prostitute, named Sasha, (Tchelet Semel) who is miserable, financially desperate, and as hot as they come. She is just a teenager, but has already seen the worst of life, and is tired of the wretched hand life has dealt her. Despite being the same age, they are complete opposites: a secluded, naïve religious boy and a grown-up fed-up whore, but both are starving for savior. And Mendy, after his first sexual experience, is convinced his lust for Sasha is love. To him, he has found his savior. Mendy also encounters another patron of the strip club, an American named Mike(Saul Stein), who turns out to be, none other than the loud mouth owner of the famous actual watering hole in Jerusalem, Mike’s Place. Now anyone who has spent any time in Jerusalem’s nightlife knows Mike’s Place. It’ll blow you away, and Saul Stein’s loud overacting captures a semi-good intentioned, ill-tempered American always looking to make a buck, have a laugh, and serve a drink.

The three hit it off like the odd couple and make their way to Jerusalem. Where Mendy loses the yamurlke, payot and religious garb and works for Mike at Mike’s place, hoping to be together with Sasha, while telling his parents and rabbi, he is going to Jerusalem to help improve his “learning.”

Working and living at Mike’s Place, Mendy is introduced to a rainbow of new extreme characters. There is the hilariously extreme American born rifle-carrying, tzit tzitz wearing settler named “The Exterminatior”( Arie Moskuna), a shady Arab businessman named Razi(Albert Illuz), a Breslov rock band, and even a vomiting drunkard shneurer. Gorlin’s characters are terrifyingly realistic and unquestionably the work of a true insider. Today, Mike’s Place has become as much as a Israeli social icon as Zion or Dizengorf square, but Gorlin knew it as much more a hole in the wall when he worked as a bartender there, either way the details and the familiar characters will flood your mind with memories.

Mendy, Sasha and the entire Mikes Place gang packs into The Exterminator’s rundown station wagon for what is hands down the funniest scene in the entire film. But this “business trip” through checkpoints and settlements, is filled with mystery, as a suspicious package is given to Mendy to smuggle back. Leaving the audience wondering: what it is in that bag? and cheering, "YES finally something resembling an actual plot!"

But instead of getting to the action, the movie drags on revolving Mendy and his infatuation for Sasha. While they may be the same age, it is really hard to buy the budding relationship. The conversations, specifically the religious ones, are many times juvenile, circular, and forced. You get the feeling that there is never any connection between Sasha and our yeshiva shlep. And are they really coming of age? Both seem to be using each other and it becomes painful to watch. Puppy love meets a lot of choppy English accents with no real direction, and its difficult for the audience to really like anyone, not even the attractive prostitute.

When I asked Gorlin and the completely secular cast about the idea of this movie being a “Chillul Hashem” something that may portray a religious Jew in a negative light. None of them seemed even concerned, or even register this film being negative. “Its just a story, about a guy going from a secluded background and exploring the world.” Gorlin explained “that’s all.” And the prostitute? “Russian prostitution is a big thing in Israel, I wanted that in the story, it is also a very biblical idea throughout literature” he explained. “Everyone’s got to face their demons, that’s what life’s journey is all about” explained Stein. But whether you buy it or not, the negatives of this film, were enough to have it rejected from Jewish Film festivals nationwide. “No one likes to air their dirty laundry” responded Gorlin.

While the chasid/prosititute wasn’t dirty enough, there is not a single character who is not selfish. One may think that the birthplace of religion people would be much more giving than taking. But Gorlin’s characters give off the impression that the only type of Israeli is the taking kind, leaving a terribly bitter taste of what Jerusalem and its people are like. “The land is toxic,” explained Semel, and desperate, self absorbed, with their own agenda and vice seems to be the theme of each character on it. Which makes the movie all the more unlikable.

Bereft of any Jerusalem’s “Love Thy Neighbor” attitude and any real direction, The Holy Land leaves you loving the familiar details, but bored and distant from characters and storyline. It offers no real genuine solutions or saviors, perhaps like real life, but in a film that may have been able to explore the complexities of a spiritual land, Mr. Gorlin only ends up revealing his own unfulfilled, and sometimes offensive, spirit. This dark and self-absorbed story brings to mind another city, but not Jerusalem. I am sure Gorlin remembered that our Jewish Sages describe two cities that existed in history with this same type of totally self-centered people - Sodom and Gemora. Just like they were overturned, Gorlin does a good job of overturning the Jerusalem that many of us know and love.

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READERS' COMMENTS:

From S. Chait:
Not to mention that the whole terrorism sub-plot --if you can even call it that-- has no place in this movie. How does exploring the underbelly of Jerusalem night life tie into the issue of terrorism? If there is a relevency the filmaker ceratinly failed to delineate it. Yes, terrorism is hinted at throughout the movie but I think it was a cheap trick by the filmmaker to rope us in and care about where the movie was going (playing on an audience's emotions is fine, but you better deliver! He doesn't). Ironically, the only redeeming moment of the movie was the ending as it was purely original-- it made me realize how there are NO films being made about suicide bombing. A far more interesting movie would have built a compelling storeyline that genuinely led up to that creepy moment of the boy running to catch up with the bus Mendy just got on.
Too bad no one's exploring the issue...perhaps us critics should stiop criticizing and do some real work ;-)

From Dnahmard@aol.com:
I saw holy land at the slamdance film festival. To be honest it went on too long and seemed pretentious. The story meandered and never really came together. the characters were dry and I didn't feel any attachment to them. I did enjoy techelets Russian accent and she looks like a hotter version of natasha lyon.

From J. K.:
Great review.

From Singlefrumguy@juno.com:
While I didn't see Holy Land, I would have to agree about the selfishness of characters portrayed as Orthodox in many films. Two blaring examples spring to mind.
1. A Price above Rubies.
The character Sonia (Renee Z.) is the classic narcissist, a totally selfish person. This story in no way depicts actual life in the orthodox Jewish world other than through the mind of one messed up, immature girl-woman. It is shameful this movie was produced with an air of credibility where none is due. Miramax, a production company started by a Jew (named after his parents, Miriam and Max), should be ashamed of themselves for producing such drivel and offering it to the general masses as truth. I am happy to say it is not.
2. Yentl
While I haven't seen this film since I was quite young, I couldn't help recognizing, even at that age and lack of religious observance what a sentimental, politically correct and religiously inaccurate crock it was. Not that I have ever been a fan of Streisand (neither as a musician nor an actor), but her leftist political activism and decision to "marry-out" over the past few years has confirmed my suspicion that she is the worst type of Jew, of the self-hating variety.