1) If there is an Upper West Side and a Lower West side, where is the Mid-west side?

2) What did the taxi driver just ask you? Can you even pronounce his name?

3) What the hell is a Throgg's neck?

4) What were New Jersey people thinking when they called the town over the Lincoln Tunnel, Hoboken?

5) Oh yeah, and what's up with Weehawken?? (however you spell that?)

6) If there is more pollution in NY, why does our water taste better than NJ water?

7) Where did all the Islanders fans come from? How come there weren't any last year? Oh yeah, and didn't New Yorkers like the Rangers? How come no one likes them now?

8) Why the hell do NY football teams play in NJ?

9) Supposedly NY has the biggest Jewish population in the US.....then why does everyone around the world use Teaneck as their Jewish geography starting point?

10) Wouldn't it be cool is Abigail's was really called "Abigail's Secret?"

11) Why the hell can't I understand a single word on the Les Marais menu? Why not put the menu in freakin English??

12) Where's the beef? (most common question asked when getting a Les Marais appetizer)

13) Who actually ate at Provi Provi when it was around?

14) What was the announcement the subway guy just made?

15) How come there are 3 deli's on every block, and not a single one goes out of business?

16) Why does the ice-cream man go by YU at 2am? What kind of kids does he think will be up at 2am??

17) Since when did the "It's just not Shayich" line become so popular? What happened to the classics?

18) Since when did the words "Please" and "Thank you" get eliminated from the dictionary?

19) If I hear the "F word" about 70 times a day, why isn't that in the dictionary? (linked to #18)

20) If a cop who rides on of those horses is in Duncan Doughnuts, where does he park his horse?

21)Why is it 10 freakin dollars for a movie, yet it's only 12$ for an Imax? Does that seem a bit odd? maybe it's just me.

22) If Abigail's and Dougie's got married, what would their kid look like?

23) Has anyone actually ever been into the "Dive Bar?"

24) Why do they call it "Wolf and Lamb" if they mostly sell beef and chicken?

25) Who REALLY knows the truth about which 7-eleven slurpee flavors are kosher?

26) If everybody hates Teaneck so much, why is everybody moving there?

27) If a toll-booth attendant gets replaced by an EZ-pass, can he sue the city for "human-discrimination?"

28) Why is Times Square in the shape of a rectangle?

29) Can we call people who live in The Village, "The Village People?"...please!!

30) Is it so hard to say "Good Shabbos" back to someone who says it to you?

These are just a few questions I had....some were just circling in my mind creatively, some I really wanted to know, and some (such as #18 and 30) I really NEED answers to. Enjoy!

Travis; Queens, NY