Just like all other religions, Jews of all ages seem to have a "meet and greet" mentality in search of their future marriage partner. Different age groups, from young teenagers through senior citizens seem to have their favorite places and times for these special social activities. Call them what you will, shindigs, hoedowns( for all you Southern folks, hey y'all), meet markets(z100),"mac daddy" madness (YU) or anything else, they have had have a big part in many of our lives at one time or another. Whether they exist as a different option to shidduchim or just to be like other nationalities is debatable, however I felt a tongue-in - cheek discussion of this phenomenon was necessary. There are many, I chose the ones I was most familiar with, and therefore could lovingly bash. I'll start off with a young age.

The Great Adventure Pesach chol hamoed NCSY trip is so entrenched in many Jewish early teen minds, that they have to somehow rationalize paying $7.00 for a hotdog on a piece of matzo and a long shlep to Yahoopitsville, NJ. These kids seem to join their local NCSY chapter just to get a reduced rate on the cost and a spot on the bus. G-d knows Six Flags prices seem to go up every year without fail, forget rising tuition costs, here's the reason why parents are taking out second mortgages on their houses. They could not imagine a Chag Ha'aviv without it. Just to go off on a short tangent here. It has become as popular as Manischevitz, and no, I am not just shamelessly plugging certain products for a tidy sum, or at least you hope I'm not. Hey, you gota do what you can to pay the bills, keep the beer in the fridge, right? Ok, beer is probably not a good example in discussing that holiday, but you get the point.

Anyway, does the saying "in the springtime, a young man's fancy turns to thoughts of love" come from this gathering? Has it replaced Tu'B'av as the time where youngsters of the Chosen Nation chase each other?. Is it just me that visualizes this; or do these kids really wear "hi my screen name is , my real name is ", nametags when they look for the teens and preteens (Jr. NCSYer's) of the opposite sex they've been talking to on "AOL Jewish chat" for the past 6 months? The "Holy Grail of southern Jersey", otherwise known as the " Fountain" in the front of the park serves as the focal point for these youngster's eye candy and pathetic pick- up lines attempts.

Next up, going in age order, happens also to be a Slalosh Regalim tradition, though this one annually takes place about 5,000 miles away from the aforementioned. The first nights of Succos are the time for this gathering. The lobby of the Inbal, formerly Laromme, hotel in Yerushalayim, serves as the place, and the 17 and 18 year old crowd of kids in Israel for the year serve as the who. Not that putting my 2 cents in counts for anything, but I highly doubt this is what Hashem meant when he told us to be Oleh Regel. You can always tell if its a three day yom tov, because the smell of cologne and/or perfume permeates the air to mask the smell of body odor that results from not showering for 3 days in the stultifying Israeli heat. Everyone is trying to see and be seen, and kissing up to all the wealthy Americans there for the holiday to leech meals off of them is du rigeur. I hate to ramble here, but speaking of those Americans, where in heck do they get the heter of only keeping one day of Yom Tov when this is the only time of the year they are in the Holy Land. All the girls who didn't bring their good outfits to seminary for fear of them being ruined, or worse, someone else having the exact same one (gasp!) regret it at a time like this. Since any food and drink is costly in such a high class establishment, the young adults try to use every trick in the book, every
means necessary, everything in their repertoire and up their sleeve, to get these gratis. True story, as I cannot fully excuse myself from this satire, I myself was at the very hotel back in '97 and was next to someone at the bar, checking out the various maidelech. I heard a guy there pick any room number at random, and asked the bartender for a drink, to be charged to that room. However, to the unlucky bochur's
consternation, the inhabitant of the room happened to be sitting at the bar, and as they say, if looks could kill.....

Now up to the plate is Simchas Torah for the college age crowd. There are a few places where these mingling take place, but to make it easier I'll concentrate on Columbia University/ Barnard. Just like Amcaf during the rest of the year, the crowd is more YU/Stern than anything else. So for the neophyte guys, the big draws are good food, ample booze and cute girls . For the girls, well, there's the chance,
albeit a small one, that they'll meet the guy of their dreams there, ( or just the one whose picture on onlysimchas- Jewish "hot or not" that they squealed over last week) or laughing at everyone who gets drunk is always a fun pastime. Plus, you get to see a real campus, have the choice to daven in shul in the heart of Harlem,(if that floats your boat) and argue religion with the JTS Reformadoxers. Of course
whispering conspiratorially about frum guys and girls that you see going to class on Yom Tov is an added bonus. That always makes for good table talk. Oh, and lest I forget, the age old clown caresque question of "how many Jews can you fit in a dorm room" gets brought up every year. What's the record at now?

send all comments about scenes I've missed to momoney5555@yahoo.com

from: Ariella:
hey - awesome article by momoney - but he forgot one of the most important scenes:

the eden roc (miami, fl) - first night of the second days of pesach. where the entire 13-17 y.o. population of the five towns and great neck + the eldest 20-somethings of the UWS congregate in their finest to chat up that 1 special someone they went to class with in the third grade. It's the night when "the favorite outfit" gets brought out, the makeup gets caked on, and inevitably, someone gets thrown in the pool. A further must for anyone who cannot refrain from partaking in other hotels' tea rooms, though being an actual guest of the Eden Roc gets you major shiduch points.

Also, it should be noted that if you're over 40 and looking, no - grossinger's does not exist, but yes - if it did, all other locales would pale by comparison. Ariella