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bangitout.com presents:

Sarah Galena's special report

How to TEACH English in CHINA!

by international educator Sarah Galena

Hello to all my fellow bangitout.com readers (people bored at work)! I am writing from Wuxi, China. Yes China!!!!! Wuxi is the city's name which mean's "Poor man's Shanghai." What optimistic people! Anyways I am here for six weeks to teach little, cute, adorable Chinese (communist) children to speak English.

This trip is what every seminary girl in Israel would call "such a chavayah!"

Get this, my first task as "the English teacher" was give all the children in my class an English name. (like Americans get French names when we took French) Sounds cool to me! Sounds like fun, naming 50 kids. Every Stern girl's dream.

So I start naming the kids. And they are loving it! And they are so cute trying to say their newly given American pseudonyms. But by the tenth kid I hit a block, and was out of "All American" names. I panic. I strain to think of wholesome names you would find in a 1950's movie. But my mind draws a complete blank. The only names that kept popping up in my mind are.....frum Jewish names. Nooo!!!! I just kept thinking to myself, "no, I can't name this girl Naomi".... "Ari is just NOT gonna work!" How about Shmueli? No. Suri? no way. Chezki? I'm dead. I say to myself please God help me think of non-yeshiva high school name!!" Luckily I hit a break with the letter J. I end up with a classroom filled with Jons, Joes, Jims, and Jens. Except for the one kid that insisted on being called Bruce Lee! For the next session I came up with a brilliant idea. Go to what all Galenas were raised on, and know best. TV. So the next day I was saved by using every single character from Beverly Hills 90210!! Brandon and Donna are now my two of my best students!

Part 2: Houston, We Have a Problem ( a lisp problem)

I have now past the name game, and moved on to teaching the students the "TH" sound now for the past 2 weeks. Every single student sounds like they have a lisp. "Happy Birsday!" "Sank you teacha!" I've figured out an analogy, teaching the "Th" sound is like teaching a Ba'al teshuva how to say the chet sound, no matter how hard they try it always seems to come out as "cchhana, pass the hallah." And so we move on.

The problem with Chinese education is that they learn everything through repetition. Something about a shortage of trees, I don?t know, but asking the kids to write something down is entirely foreign. I would love to see how this technique works on the college level! "Repeat- E equals MC squared!"

Pretty much my day consists of asking the students questions- "What is the weather like today?" and having them repeat it. Once they finally get the idea of ANSWERING a question, I will ask them "What do you like to do?" Then the whole class responds together, ?It is sunny and hot." Well what can I do, I tried my best- at least they can leave the camp saying they have a picture with a white girl. (I had to pose with all my students for their class pictures- I was like Santa Claus for a day!) Then all the kids ask you for their autographs! Quite an ego boost!

As for China, the country is crowded with millions of bikes and cars, here a moped is a family vehicle. They have tried to modernize china by adding Christmas lights to everything- Imagine crouching tiger hidden dragon taking place in Vegas! But they make up for everything by having karaoke in every single bar!!!!

Well that's about all, time to go teach the kids how to do the electric slide. (Who would have thought that skill would be used again?!?)

email me in China! sgalena@aol.com

I am a foreign student from Jiang Nan University, wuxi. the day after tomorrow is my semester final exam so i haven't sleep the whole night......trying to study. But suddenly just now i have seen your artical about teaching english in china on bangitout and i laugh.........laugh ........laugh...............i burst out into laughing............you are so funny writer. are you still at wuxi? are you still at wuxi? where do you teach? at Lampton instituon?

From Daniela:
sarah, love your article! i love your stories, sounds like china is awesome, i can't wait to hear your stories in the flesh!

From Naphtali:
and the best foreign language teaching scene in a movie goes to:
the first scene of Stripes...where eugene levy (i think) sings with the class 'da do run run run da do run run...

From Elana:
you are hilarious....the article really was impressive and it sounds like you are having a BLAST!
I cant wait to see pics.

From Adam, frequent bangitout.com-er:
China Correspondence: Rock On! Teaching English in China sounds really cool.Keep up the good work.

From Rlourie1:
I just discovered your article on bang it out- I love it! send them more

From Sara Aarona Fisher:
Hey, Sar! I loved your article. Sooo funny. You're a really good writer. How are ya? Love, Sara

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What optimistic people! Anyways I am here for six weeks to teach little, cute, adorable Chinese (communist) children to speak English. This trip is what every seminary girl in Israel would call "such a chavayah!" Get this, my first task as "the English teacher" was give all the children in my class an English name. (like Americans get French names when we took French) Sounds cool to me! Sounds like fun, naming 50 kids. Every Stern girl's dream. So I start naming the kids. And they are loving it! And they are so cute trying to say their newly given American pseudonyms. But by the tenth kid I hit a block, and was out of "All American" names. I panic. I strain to think of wholesome names you would find in a 1950's movie. But my mind draws a complete blank. The only names that kept popping up in my mind are.....frum Jewish names. Nooo!!!! I just kept thinking to myself, "no, I can't name this girl Naomi".... "Ari is just NOT gonna work!" How about Shmueli? No. Suri? no way. Chezki? I'm dead. I say to myself please God help me think of non-yeshiva high school name!!" Luckily I hit a break with the letter J. I end up with a classroom filled with Jons, Joes, Jims, and Jens. Except for the one kid that insisted on being called Bruce Lee! For the next session I came up with a brilliant idea. Go to what all Galenas were raised on, and know best. TV. So the next day I was saved by using every single character from Beverly Hills 90210!! Brandon and Donna are now my two of my best students! -------------------------- Part 2: Houston, We Have a Problem ( a lisp problem) I have now past the name game, and moved on to teaching the students the "TH" sound now for the past 2 weeks. Every single student sounds like they have a lisp. "Happy Birsday!" "Sank you teacha!" I've figured out an analogy, teaching the "Th" sound is like teaching a Ba'al teshuva how to say the chet sound, no matter how hard they try it always seems to come out as "cchhana, pass the hallah." And so we move on. The problem with Chinese education is that they learn everything through repetition. Something about a shortage of trees, I don?t know, but asking the kids to write something down is entirely foreign. I would love to see how this technique works on the college level! "Repeat- E equals MC squared!" Pretty much my day consists of asking the students questions- "What is the weather like today?" and having them repeat it. Once they finally get the idea of ANSWERING a question, I will ask them "What do you like to do?" Then the whole class responds together, ?It is sunny and hot." Well what can I do, I tried my best- at least they can leave the camp saying they have a picture with a white girl. (I had to pose with all my students for their class pictures- I was like Santa Claus for a day!) Then all the kids ask you for their autographs! Quite an ego boost! As for China, the country is crowded with millions of bikes and cars, here a moped is a family vehicle. They have tried to modernize china by adding Christmas lights to everything- Imagine crouching tiger hidden dragon taking place in Vegas! But they make up for everything by having karaoke in every single bar!!!! Well that's about all, time to go teach the kids how to do the electric slide. (Who would have thought that skill would be used again?!?) email me in China! sgalena@aol.com Love, Sarah Reader Comments: From Parvez I am a foreign student from Jiang Nan University, wuxi. the day after tomorrow is my semester final exam so i haven't sleep the whole night......trying to study. But suddenly just now i have seen your artical about teaching english in china on bangitout and i laugh.........laugh ........laugh...............i burst out into laughing............you are so funny writer. are you still at wuxi? are you still at wuxi? where do you teach? at Lampton instituon? thanks again for such an article. From Daniela: sarah, love your article! i love your stories, sounds like china is awesome, i can't wait to hear your stories in the flesh! From Naphtali: and the best foreign language teaching scene in a movie goes to: the first scene of Stripes...where eugene levy (i think) sings with the class 'da do run run run da do run run... From Elana: you are hilarious....the article really was impressive and it sounds like you are having a BLAST! I cant wait to see pics. From Adam, frequent bangitout.com-er: China Correspondence: Rock On! Teaching English in China sounds really cool.Keep up the good work. From Rlourie1: I just discovered your article on bang it out- I love it! send them more From Sara Aarona Fisher: Hey, Sar! I loved your article. Sooo funny. You're a really good writer. How are ya? Love, Sara