9. "Kal VeChomer" - If I dumped him and he was fat, but smart; how much more so with you, fat dumbass.

8. “Payrush le'Kamun” the simple automatic response to any question regarding your corrupt irreligious past or addictive smoking habit.

7. “Sanaygor Yaseh Kataygor!” - meaning “I was going to dump you anyway.”

6. “Im lo Achshav, Amusai” reliable line to use when she politely offers to pay.

5. “Al Tarbeh Sicha im ha Isha” : solid excuse for fooling around

4. “Tav leMaitav Tan Du...” translation: She’s Desperate. Always keep this in mind throughout the date, especially when selecting on an elegant restaurant, like KD or J2.

3. “Shtika k Hodaah” - meaning: He/She was so quiet, hence- I’m getting dumped.

2. “Tafusta Maruba Lo Tafusta” - translation: You’re balding, overweight and haven’t had a date in 6 months. Take what you can get!

1. “Yad Soledes Bo”- term meaning “She’s/He’s freakin Hot!”

www.bangitout.com

For comments or request for a date send all email to isaac

Readers Comments: SUBMIT

From YAHO19@aol.com
Mishateh ani bach when your girlfriend reminds you with two mintues left in the jets playoff game that you promised to take her shopping.

From BruriahGrl@aol.com
ad d'lo yada: (1)your date is totally drunk
(2) your date is dumb blonde
(3) your date can't tell u apart from his/her ex-boyfriend/girlfriend

From Moshe Greenfield:
chaticha de'issurah-- so hot but you cant touch it

From Adam Berkowitz:
1. Dayo Lavo Min Hadin Liyos KeNidon -- Just because her sister's cool, doesnt mean SHE'S cool!!!
2. Lo Makdim Inish Peraniyot LeNafshei -- No guy will knowingly date a girl he's not attracted to...
3. Migo -- She said she has to be home in an hour. Thats not alot of time, but she could have said she wants to go home NOW!... therefore she must still like me...
but...
4. Ein Migo BeMakom Edim -- If her friend tells you she's not interested, she's really not interested.

From Yonatan Jacobs:
Ye'ush shelo medaas, havei ye'ush - If your pal's girlfriend is about to break up with him, and he doesn't know, it's ok to fool around with her.

Mitzvah gedolah leh'yos b'simcha - date girls named Simcha

Mihu haAshir? Hasome'ach b'chelko - "Please let your daughter date me even though I'm unemployed and hope to stay that way."
Beitza she'nolda b'Yom Tov - Flatulence at the Seder in her parents' house

From Shael Sokolowski :
GREAT site by the way :) here are a few possible additions to the, already amazing, talmudic relationship terms...

"ikla" - you just "happened to be visiting" a girl...

"b'dieved in, l'chatchila lo" - you realized that it ended up working out with some girl in the end --though you didn't hold out much hope in the beginning.

"trei..tilat.." - counting out how many rejections you've gotten from girls that week.

"teima" - what you say when you see a truly beautiful girl.."a great source of wonderment."

"butel b'rov / butel b'shishim" --the concept you use to justify the one ugly girl in a group of beautiful ones. (it's all good)

**There's a great one from Bubba Metziah in Hamafkid that says something about the fact that you cant purchase a tree that doesnt exist..the punchline would be something like "forget about it pal..you have no chance with that girl"

From Adam Katz :
mitoch she lo lishmah, bah lishma- i don't really like her, but her family's got lots of money, so maybe i'll come to like her once i marry her(cha-ching!)

From Dov Wasserman :
"My Neshama Yesayra": Term of endearment for a developing pot-belly grown a bit too large for your girlfriend's taste. You should smile like a contented budha and pat (never rub) your belly when invoking this phrase to difuse any counter-attack involving "V'chai bahem". Should never be used *by* the girlfriend; even if she is happy with her plus-size, too likely to elicit response of "b'sha'ah tova, I'm outta here."

"Poomphakert": Subtle yet effective counterpoint to any objection raised to your set-up attempt. "This cousin's neighbor, I'm telling you Zevy, she's very pretty, very petite." "Gershon, I've told you for years that I'm looking for a tall girl." "Poomphakert! And where has it gotten you?". Regional variant: "Adarabbah."

"Adar": An extremely good-looking girl; a head-turner. Derived from: "m'shinichnas Adar, marbim b'simcha." "Wow, check out thar Adar that just came in to shul." [Though any such mention is, by definition, superfluous.]

"Mai shiyer d'hai shiyer?" If, on a set-up attempt, the girl is not described as "absolutely stunning" or the guy is not praised for being "a real, true mensch", this phrase is the appropriate qurey as to what else the shadchan isn't mentioning.

"Shnei k'suvim ha'machshichin zeh et zeh": Your favorite aunt describes her neighbor's neice as a "sweet, nice girl, from a wonderful, frum family, with terrific midos", while your old college roommate says he just ran into her dirty dancing to the latest Ricky Martin beat at the Sound Factory (the girl, not your aunt; and he used a more earthy description of her dancing style). The ultimate Upper West Side dillema: Do you go out with her next week for coffee like your aunt originally arranged? Or do you ask her out yourself for this Saturday night?

"Bayis Neeman": A women with such a build that you know "they're real." May be used for both small and large frames.

"Af al pi chen": your girlfriend just deflated your only lame excuse not to do some girly thing with her, but you're just not going anyway. "Oh, honey, I can't go shoe-shopping with you now, you know I have my 6:00 chavrusa." "Your chavrusa got married and moved to Riverdale two years ago." "Af al pichen."

From Ephraim Shapiro:
"A'Vada" -The ultimate response one hopes to hear when popping the question.