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Top Ten Sons Left out of the Seder

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Top ten similarities between Operation Iraqi Freedom and the Passover Story

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(model UN)

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Top 19 signs you are a Jewish student at Binghamton University

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Ways you know you went on the JC Solidarity Mission

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Top 30 signs you are from Jewish Elizabeth, NJ

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Chanukah Pickup Lines

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You know when your at a kosher aerobics studio when..

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Top 18 (Chai!) "Al Chaits" of Shtark YU Guys

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7 Habits Of Highly Modern Orthodox Females

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Top 10 People you kinda wish weren't part of the Tribe

Top 10 reasons to think the restaurant you are eating in is probably not kosher

Top 10 dishes served at an Upper West Side Shabbos Dinner

Top 10 things most likely found on a Jewish resume

7 Habits of highly Yeshivish People

Top 10 things most likely found at Shalosh Seudos

The Kosher Top 10
Top Ten Signs You Went to Camp MANAVU

 by Adam Tyberg

10. After the famous R' Klein/ R' Kolko split, you still sided with R' Kolko, & always wondered how much he got in the "settlement".

9. You can't listen to Yisroel Williger at all now because of overkill, the year his first album came out, they played his music every day & night.

8. You vividly remember going to inter-camps chanting "Let's get a little bit snobby MA NA VU", & banging on the ceiling of the bus.

7. As a junior staff member you prided yourself in scheduling your off days on Wednesdays, as that night was the weekly mixed roller skating night at the rink in Woodbury.

6. You knew you were the only camp that had "Neighborhood Day". You had quite a time explaining the phenomenon to your friends in other camps.

5. Another camp question never answered: What was the point of the golf course if we never played on it?

4. Even on the Canada trip, they still made you wear a hat & jacket for davening. Unbelievable!

3. No matter what was happening in any league game, there was always a 15 minute "snack break" at a horribly assigned time every day. Kind of like the cigarette intermission break at the movies in Israel - always seems to come at quite an inopportune time.

2. Somehow, each bunk only got to go go-carting twice each summer, yet arts & crafts was twice a week.

1. According to them, if you are reading this, you "went off the derech" somewhere along the line



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From Anonymous:
You remember when shloime had a full head of red hair.
You remember when shloime wore shorts to play baseball.
You know who lippy is.
You referred to him as lippy behind his back.
You always wondered what his deal was.
You helped burn the garbage on the rainy days.
You were made to think that "only learning" 3 hours a day in the summer was getting off easy.
You remember the rotting smell near shloimies house.
You remember the story and smile.
You still imitate Yudi's Havdala.
You hum during kiddish.
The only day longer than yom kippur is the third day of color war, and you really wonder why the hell did u go to this camp.
You remember going on school bus to hershey park and back, 3 to a seat without any bathrooms, being told that you wre privliged to go.
You know what HMS is.
You remember when everyone was a Met fan.
You know whats really in the bug juice.
You never ate again once you were a waiter.
You know who Big Bertha is.
You always wondered why all those silly pictures were hanging in the dining room.
You were happy when they got rid of lineups.
You were wondering what they hell they were thinking in having them.
Destroying tables was the shabbos afternoon activity.
You always wondered why the camp took you to Dorney and didnt let you on the water rides, of all the other religious people were on them.
You know what went on in the swimming pool during morning learning groups.
You then wondered how religious these people really were.
You are still wondering why they have those ridiculous paddleboard courts.
You really wanted to call the INS on the hired help.
You also wanted to call Planned Parenthood about them.
You knew how do call on the camps phones without paying.
You knew the code for the camps phone.
You knew how to accept collect calls on the camp phone.
You remember when Yudi got a technical for leading the camp onto the court in middle of a game after they scored 100. (It's on video).
You wonder what happened to that famous arial picture of Ma-Na-Vu.
You have always contemplated the best way of digging up all the grass around shloimies house.
You know you Dr. Death is. (thats the nicest name i could come up with). You think im being kind my calling him Dr. Death.
You remember when they wouldn't (out of tznius) call the Dr. by his last name. ;).
You remember when yudi and shloimie would go on vacation toghether.
You sing ritze to some god awful tune.
You have seen the impact of smoking on some peoples voices.
You promise yourself that youll never get a combover...ever...
You always wanted to walk to chedva. You actualy made it.
You werent bright enough to get anywhere with it.
You know who ernie and bert are.
You know that masmid = ashtray.
You know at least one masmid that never saw the b"m.
You know at least one masmid that didn't know how to read hebrew.
You always wondered what went on in yudi's house, post yudi.
Then once you thought about it for more than one second, you really dont want to know.
You always wondered how many blobstein kids there really were.
You know who chelsea is. And you know that the real chelsea is prettier. By allot.







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