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The Kosher Top 10
Top 10 Ways You Know You Are From Northeast Philadelphia
by
Frannie S., Rebecca G., and Chavi B.
10. You get annoyed when people do the "Fresh Prince of Bel-air" rap because the northeast is 40 whole minutes away from west Philly.
9. You think it is normal for a boy to say he goes to Stern.
8. If you are a girl--you must make sure to bring a male escort to Holy Land Pizza to protect you from the creepy Mexican guys.
7. You live on a block with 100 kids and there are only 10 houses on your block.
6. You have your Melave Malka at Krispy Kreme or Rita's Wooder Ice, depending on the season.
5. Oh, and yes, you pronounce it "wooder".
4. Your freshly baked bread is really a day old from Brooklyn.
3. You can't remember the last time TA had a boys class that made a minyan.
2. Your shul choices involve all house shuls and one barn.
1. You are taking bets on who the 2004 senior kallah will be.
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From Ldyblunote
10 ways you know you're a BABY BOOMER from Jewish NE Philly
1) You never question the fact that Rabbi Yolles' name is still found on
food products, despite the fact he's been dead for years.
2) You go to Lakewood to buy your clothes, and then see the same dress on
10 girls at a simcha in Philly....or....if you have better taste...
3) Twice a year you go to Edythe's - when she has her semi-annual sale,
and run into all the other women from your shul.
4) Jay Press is your travel agent
5) You'll daven in any shul in the Northeast, except Rabbi Novitsky's
6) You went to Temple University, and commuted.
7) You find it really annoying when New Yorkers refer to you as being from
Pennsylvania, and really, REALLY annoying when, even after you tell them
that Philadelphia is a city IN Pennsylvania, they ask you if you know
their cousin in Pittsburgh.
8) You ate at Goldberg's Dairy Restaraunt on Castor Avenue, and still get
teary eyed if you find yourself at 7th and Girard
9) No matter what shul you went to on Simchas Torah you always ended up at
the Lubavitcher Center to see Rabbi Shemtov trying to stop a 59 bus
10) Ricnees Pizza. 'Nuff said.
From Matt Greenberg, Stamford, CT
Ok,
some more
1) You play Jewish Trivial pursuit, and your entire deck of cards (200 of
them) are made up of restaurants that once existed in Philadelphia.
2) You go to the boslover hall to watch the local orthodox rabbis fight over who
is ACTUALLY the chief rabbi of Philadelphia.
3) There is nothing like a hot dog from Sandlers but no one trusts it,
(although you see all your friends there sunday morning)
4) Everyone goes to New York to buy kosher meat..... that was slaughtered and
prepared in Philly!!!
From Noach Bernstein
- You consider Clover the mall.
- You envy Overbrook Park.
- If you were a girl you had a crush on Yossi Alakayim.
- If you were a guy you had a crush on one of the Fialkof girls.
- You trained all year for the Torah Academy vs. Hebrew Academy bball game (and if you were playing for T.A. you suffered an identity crisis).
- You wore one of those Eagles 'Starter' jackets that were really cool in 1993.....only you had them last winter.
- You lived next door to your Rebbe from school.
- You've actually been to Pennypack Park.
From Wrthrobc@aol.com
Lower Merion people think they're so trendy now by buying big SUV's. while your family preceded them with by having a Chevy Suburban since 1974 (the same one).
From Ezra Fass
- During the summers, you worked in Kol-Simcha day-camp as a counselor for kids who were 5 months younger than you.
- If you went to Hebrew Academy, then the only time you interacted with Lower Merion kids was during NCSY Shabbatons in Baltimore.
- Although you're 25 years old, you are still scared of all the 10 year old non-jewish kids who live on your block.
- You believe that sweatpants are appropriate for almost any occasion.
From Shais Galena
-Pitome Pizza is the benchmark for how all pizza should taste
-You attribute your low self-esteem to the fact that you grew up on a street called "Dorkis"
-Your usual Sunday afternoon includes spending 2 hours watching the Fudge Factory make fudge at the Franklin Mills Mall. If not that, you are shopping for dream cars at the Roosevelt Blvd Auto
Mall.
-Walk into any shul, if there isn't a guy with gold necklace and a Phillies hat, you're not in NE.
-Walk into any shul, if there isn't an Israeli wearing a purple yamaka talking to a Russian about PepBoys and car transmission, you are out of town.
-By default, you speak Russian.
-Elkin's Park is for snobs, Yardley is for wasps, Winfield is where you send your sons to yeshiva, Lower Merion is for modernish people who sold their souls to the devil, Ardmore is where you send your daughters to highschool, Overbrook Park is good, but too close to Lower Merion.
-Every street direction you ever gave includes the following: Rawhn Rawhnhurst Roosevelt Blvd. Cottman and Roosevelt Blvd (again).
-You end every sentence with a preposition... "Where Sports Authorty at?"
- Your vacations include Sesame Place, Dutch Wonderland, Hershey Park, and a trip to flatbush
- When you say you went to Central, you don't mean the frum girls school in NYC.
- The Cheltanham Bus is always ten minutes late arriving at TA. This is a known fact. The driver always hollers "Cheltanham!" but does he fail to realize it is printed on the side of his bus?
From Yisroel Galena
- You despise Lower Merion kids, primarily cause they have a backyard
- The Pizza place has changed owners and names 5 times, yet there is always some girl wearing an "I Love Rick Tochet" neclace behind the desk
- You may not be frum, but you certainly know Rabbi Lezarovski lived in the house of the Chofetz Chaim.
- Your entire social life was spent on the 45 minute coed bus ride to TA. Which you said you hated, but in your heart you couldn't live without.
- You worship Rabbi Powers, and are pretty sure that most of those exagerated Artscroll Tzaddik stories are about him
- You can do a perfect Rabbi Brisman impersonation
- You go to Queens and feel like home, just with more restaraunts
- You know the center of worldwide Lubavich is nowhere near Crown Heights
- Your older siblings all went to BJ, and always point out some dirty ivy covered wall as the "old Beth Jacob" building
- You know Rabbi Herschel Schacter's Bais Yaacov Joke about BJ
- You know what daf is written on Rabbi Young's tombstone
- You love Weiss's Bakery
- The Greatest Day of your Life: Your Bar Mitzvah Pic at Fleets in the Jewish Exponent
- You get teary eyed anytime an Allen L. Rothenberg commercial comes on
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