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The Kosher Top 10
Top Ten Stereotypes of Jewish
Girls
by
Heyden Graham
10.
She'll "just have the salad"
9.
Her name is Rachel
8.
She’s five foot two
7.
She has curly dark hair (but she blows it straight)
6.
She's "really down to earth"
5.
Skirts to shul, track pants to the gym
4.
She is a social worker/teacher/health care provider/Jewish service
professional
3.
She loves children
2.
She always has to pee
1.
And the last, best stereotype of a Jewish Girl: She’s always cold.
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From~Jo
Her cellphone is connected to her ear
She has at least one skirt that she "lives in"
After coming back from Israel, she's shomer negiah
She has "coffee dates" with her girlfriends
She is either getting an associates degree or taking classes part-time (this
only applies if she's single)
Checks onlysimchas every week
She goes shopping, and complains the store didn't have anything that fit
right, but came out with a bag full of clothes
Daddy's credit-card is being worn thin
Gushes over her "babies" (her neices and nephews) and buys them outfits from
Baby Gap
She remembers having $20 but doesn't know where it went
From Moe
they are easy! But they are prude.
From MS, Toronto
will reward herself with frozen yogurt- but if shes from toronto, she'll top it with chocolate chip cookie dough or some other type of chocolate
eats like a pig- no, like a boy
From Malkiel
She feels cool when she wears her New Balance sneakers
She has a list of who will be invited to her wedding
She always has to order something and ask if the chef can make it just a bit different
She owns 4 business suits and she has never worked a day in her life
She never plans on working a day in her life
She thinks she is hot, especially when she is complimenting you on how you look.
She rewards herself with frozen yogurt
She has a friend who she cries to daily
She has a friend who she loves to trash talk
She davens on the train, or at least hopes someone notices her pocket siddur
She has a platonic guy friend who she loves to tease cause she knows he likes her
She uses the word gevalt when the train finally comes
She is sick of walking down people's isles
She can't remember life without her a cellphone, car and credit card.
She went through a relgiious faze, but it was just a faze.
She went through a rebellious faze, but it was just a faze.
She bitches to her mom, who then bitches to her dad, who than bitches to his coworkers who than screw up at work
She wants to be cool but also elegant. She fails in both
She wants to be cool but frum. She fails in both
From Msaltz
just to let you know, i like learning gemara and my name isn't rachel...and i
will eat more than salad (not that anyone would believe that)
everything else is true, but you forgot to mention some...
1. her wardrobe consists of blue jean skirts, black skirts, black cardigans,
and t-shirts of every other color (with matching hair accessories) so it looks
like she has a ton of clothes
2. she has a pair of naot sandals; all her other shoes are maddens
3. after israel, her pants collect dust as she suddenly becomes the frummest
girl on earth
4. she showers every morning; if she doesn't have time to straighten her hair,
she wears it in a bun on top of her head
JBS, LM
- She isn't shomer, but tries to be with her boyfriend
- She can't stand learning gemarah
From Rachel
With respect to no 7: Essential pieces of life saving equipment Hair dryer, straightening gel and straighteners
She made her decision to move to Israel only after IKEA opened a franchise.
From Frieda Shor
11. Shes frum, but with it.
12. She hates being fleishig.
13. She hates washing/bentching.
14. She wants a yeshivish, balebatish, chassidish, rich, "pas-bimelach tochel" boy man.
From Michelle
She loves onlysimchas.com
She thinks frozen yogurt is a meal
She shops at the GAP and Banana, and will buy anything with a DKNY label
Two words: Lip Gloss
She loves HASC sweatshirts
She mocks bangitout.com, but can't get enough of it
From Dan
She works in OT/PT
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