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The Kosher Top 10
Top Ten Ways you know you're Leaving Early on Fridays
by
m. lasar
10. The coffee stand guy from the corner of 96th and Amsterdam is still
there when you come home
9. You naturally respond to coworkers' "Good morning" with "hava good
weekend!"
8. You hit AM rush hour traffic on the return trip
7. Your coworkers are leaving for early lunch, you are leaving for early
dinner
6. Your wakeup alarm is still going off when you come home
5. You confidentially tell coworkers sunset time is always 18 minutes
after the boss gets in
4. After a tough day at work on Friday you relax by watching The View
3. Upset when "Morning meeting" conflicts with bus departure times
2. Your leaving and your 2hr parking meter still has time left on it
1. It's Tuesday
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From Asher F.K.
.You take the stairs to your 50th floor office, because by the time the elavator gets there, you gotta head back.
2. You wonder why you never got a chance to turn on your computer, & you are stepping out.
3. You are leaving work and still holding your coffee mug from the mornning.
4. You Pull the fire alarm at 8am to kill the building traffic by 10am when you have to leave.
5. You take your Surf Board to work with you, to surf down the stairs, because elevator is slow.(don't try this @ home)
6. Your friends call you a rapper wanna be, because you're limping to your Aliya on Shabbat mornning.( They don't do know you had to take the stairs to your 50th floor office)
7. You take the window exit, because you know you'll be seeing your mother in law tonight.
8. You take a talking clock to work, to make sure you don't lose track of time.
9. You keep saying Yom Shishi Pa-amayim Ki Tov!
10. You read Bang It Out "Top Ten Ways you know you're Leaving Early on Fridays" on Thursday night before you go to bed.
From Frieda Shor
1. You cant understand why people need to rush on these "SHORT???" shabbosim?????, as you enter a baking contest for the world's largest challah.
2. Your meditation mantra is "TGIF"
3. The only section of the davening you will pray is "Hayom Yom Sheinee B'Shabbos..."
4. Your nickname is "Girl Friday"
5. You name your newborn baby "Bat Shisha" instead of "Bat Sheva"
From Tzippi
Your goyish (or more often, your self hating jewish) co-worker feels the need to check the NY times sunset times, and warn you that you are leaving too early.
From Chanoch
duh, it's dark out.
From Shiri
The first thing you do when getting into work is puttin on your AWAY message
You leave from lunch
You call your gefite fish at dinner, lunch
Your Friday morning shower is also your pre-shabbos shower
The 18 minutes starts only after you get home
Turning off the car radio, is your sign that shabbos has started
From G. Strong
-- You do not answer the phone after 10:00 a.m. for fear it may be a new assignment that will keep you late
-- Non Jews around you keep on saying they wish they were Jewish so they too can get out of work early.
-- You wear shabbas clothes to work b/c by the time you get home it is shabbas already.
-- You leave on Friday (at a law firm) when the name partner is just arriving.
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