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Bang us Feedback: bang isaac
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the daily bang | kosher top 10 | movies that bang | music that bangs | books that bang | forwards that bang |apartments that bang | home |
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The Kosher Top 10 Top 42 |
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1. Pray here often? 2. I must have great kavanah, because I think my prayers have just been answered. 3. This Social Hall may have been dedicated in 1946, but I've been dedicated to you ever since you entered the room. 4. You know, having kiddush in this room reminds me of having kiddushin this June. 5. I may do hagbah with no difficulty, but picking up a girl like you is intimidating. 6. I see you are using the new linear siddur. Does that mean a lame one-liner might work on you? 7. You are the reason we need a mechiztah in this shul. 8. Since we're in a "beis knesset", do I have a chance of getting to base with you? 9. The rabbi's sermons can put people to sleep. Care to hear his shiur together? 10. You know, I had my bris down the hall in this shul. Want to see where? 11. You're the kind of woman that belongs on a pedestal, like up in the women's section. 12. A woman like you makes me wish our mechitza were see-through. 13. If you're wearing that hat just because you're cold, some of that schnapps ought to warm us up. 14. Don't let my tallis-bag fool you -- I got it for my Bar-Mitzvah. 15. This kiddush ginger-ale is quite flat. Unlike yourself. 16. Is that pound cake as stale as this pickup line? 17. Just like the Ner Tamid, my love for you burns eternal. 18. The first line of the Shma commands us to "Love the Lord with all your heart." After meeting you, I don't think I can keep that mitzvah. 19. Whenever I see you, I think of the shammes, also known as the sexton. 20. Hebrew? I barely even know you. 21. Like the tenth man to make a minyan, you...complete...me. 22. You had me at Adon (Olam), you had me at Adon. 23. Like an incoherent chazan, I'd like to whisper sweet nothings in your ear. 24. I think I've lost my page number. Can I have yours? 25. Won't you bimah, bimah baby tonight. 26. Just as this shtender holds this siddur close to my eyes at a good viewing angle, I'd like to hold you close to my heart like a beautiful angel. 27. I may bless God that "He did not make me a woman", but I'm sure glad He made you one! 28. In this shul, women are not called up to the torah. May I call you up at home? 29. You know, I think you owe me a back rub; my neck is sore from noticing you up in the women's section all morning... 30. I notice that your Artscroll Siddur is dog-earred at Tehillim. Could I be what you've been praying for? 31. If this shul really is a meat market, you must be 100% Glatt Kosher. 32. The Tenth Commandment prohibits us from coveting our neighbor's ox or ass. I sure hope you live across town! 33. Above the ark we are reminded to "Know Who Is Before You Always". Before you, there was no one, and now I am after you! 34. I hope you're not married, because I'd hate to be breaking the Tenth Commandment right here in shul. 35. This chazzan is going so fast, I keep losing my place. Can I use yours? 36. Excuse me, I'm looking for my wife in the women's section. Could you be her? 37. The biblical source for prayer is Isaac praying in the field. Are you playing the field? 38. I have perfect kavanah when I see you davening, because all I can think is Thank God! 39. You must feel fortunate to have a minyan wherever you go, cause baby, you're a 10! 40. Do you wear a hat to shul even in warm weather? Would you like to? Please send all comments, questions, and phone numbers to koshertop10 correspondent dov wasserman
From michelle faerber monsey ny |
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