When someone says, "Oh, you're from Minnesota, do you know so-and-so?" there's no question...of course you do.

'Yeshiva' is defined as a public school with enough Jews that they give you the High Holidays off.

You are the only non-blond outside of your immediate family.

You have to move to a different state before you encounter men that are shorter than you. Even the (3) Jewish boys in Minnesota are tall!

All of your friends are busy on Christmas Eve. And Wednesday nights.

You know every person in the movie theater on Christmas Day.

It's "Uffda!" not "Oy vey!"

When people ask what religion you are, they mean Catholic or Lutheran?

There is none of this dating only people who believe in the same height mechitzah as you, who don't go by the same certain hashgachas as you, who only learned under certain rabbis, etc. ...if he is Jewish, he's perfect.

If your date's cousin's dog groomer's step-sister is Jewish, your parents already want him as a son-in-law.

You are not allowed to join the cheerleading/football/hockey (really insert any sport) team, not because they practice on shabbos, but because your parents think it is a "goyish" activity.

You give up something for Lent because of peer pressure.

When the first group breaks off of the shul to start their own, you finally have a real community.

Not only do you know what lutefisk and lefse are, you know that they are kosher.

You are blacklisted from the neighborhood play group at age 5 because you said there was no such thing as Santa Claus.

People ask if your family moved to Minnesota for chinuch purposes.

Walk to shul? It's over 5 miles to your nearest neighbor! (Just kidding.)

Please send all comments, questions, and phone numbers to Alexandra Cooper

Readers Comments: SUBMIT

from Jennifer Block Martin:
Loved this top 10. I grew up outside of Boston, where I was one of 8 Jews in my high school class. But my parents were from NYC and I was shipped off to Jewish camp every summer. I moved to Des Moines for work in the 90s. Talk about culture shock. I was considered "ethnic" by my coworkers. I posted "the Yiddish word of the week" on my cubicle wall -- they loved it. I've lived in San Francisco for the last 7 years, a more diverse to say the least. This top 10 brought all my midwestern memories back.

from AChester99@aol.com:
im from minnesota and im jewish (religious even) and i dont know what the hell your talking about. why dont i get any of these things?
 

from Rugulah@aol.com:
Don't forget coats, mittens and warm boots in the sukkah. (We love it here. Really. And I've lived in a lot of other places.)

from Shleve1:
Re: Jews in Minnesota
1) You know you're a Jew in Minnesota when someone asks you why you moved there, and you realize that there's absolutely, without doubt, no excuse.
2) The average Jew has eaten a deer...that he shot.
3) You pull out your hair as your neighbors refuse to acknowledge that their hometown sucks and then ask you, "what's yenimsvelt?"
4) Everyone's crazy...but for real, this time.
5) You consume iced beverages in the sukkah...to warm up.
6) There's still snow when Pesach arrives (read again and again until this sinks in).
7) Just about any destination becomes "Ir Hakodesh."
8) You can finally remember the east-west alignment of Michigan, Wisconsin, and Minnesota...oh, wait.
9) You got shipped off to a yeshiva against your will...and returned against your parents'.

from Anonymous
Alex Cooper rocks, and so do Jewish people from Minnesota. Yea for Edina, Mendota Heights, and Golden Valley. But don't forget about those Chicagoans. Northbrook Court cineplex on Christmas is packed, and I know everyone there.


from Anonymous
Minnesota Jews- you've forgotten the best part about it- AQUAVIT!




from: Ilana Kobrin

i loooooove alex. GIVE IT UP FOR MENDOTA HEIGHTS, MN 55118 baby!!!!

not only is this 100% true but i can add some very important points.

Standing at 5'7" with medium brown hair, I am officially the "shortest and darkest" person in the entire state.

Christmas eve at Mystic Lake casino is a whos who of the Minnesota Jewish community.

bar mitzvah, a.k.a. becomming a man, means going to the DNR with your dad and applying for your first hunting and fishing licences.

Being part of "the frozen chosen" means going with your friends families for ice-fishing rather than your own as your parents are busy at home decorating the sukkah!