This evening marks the beginning ofRosh Hashanah, the Jewish New Year. Jews all over the world gather with family and friends around the dinner table to celebrate what they hope to be a sweet new year.
While the two day holiday is very much a celebration, it can also at times feel like an interrogation. From being questioned by your family members about your future, to having awkward catch up sessions with people you only see once a year at temple, Rosh Hashanah may be considered ahighholdiay, but it still has its lows.
Here are the 20 most annoying questions you have to deal with on Rosh Hashanah:
When your mom asks you to set the table and you feel like you’re ten years old again.
When your grandpa asks you what you’re doing with your life because he seems to disapprove of everything you do.
When your grandma asks you, “when’s the wedding?” in front of your girlfriend.
When you’re asked to sit at the kids table because the grown up table is too full.
When your Aunt asks you where you live in the city, like she doesn’t know the answer is Murray Hill.
*NYC Jew joke.
When your Dad asks you to say the prayer.
When your non-Jewish friend asks you why you call it the New Year.
When your uncle makes the joke, “Who’s reading the four questions?” even though it’s the wrong holiday.
When some old lady you don’t recognize at temple asks you if you remember her.
When your grandpa asks you if you are fasting for Yom Kippur next week.
When your creepy uncle asks for you to introduce him to some “nice chicks.”
When a kid you hated from high school asks you to catch up.
When your rabbi asks if you are going to start attending temple every week in the coming year.
When your cantor asks if you ever got that speech impediment fixed.
When your cousin asks you to pass the apples and honey.
When someone asks you what Jewish year it is.
When your grandma asks you to pass her teeth.
When your family friend stops by and asks if you want to help change the new baby.
When your annoying cousin asks you to take a break from the table to go outside for some air.
When your grandpa asks what you thought of the shofar?
When your grandpa asks you what you thought of the rabbi’s sermon.