A lady dining in a fine restaurant is about to take a bite when she turns to the man at the table next to her.
"Pardon me, sir" she says. "Your napkin fell on the floor."
"Oi! Tanks for dat. Vitout you, I vouldn't know. I'm blindt." He reaches down to find his napkin.
Once it's back on his lap, he asks her if he spilled any food on his shirt.
"Hardly at all," she answers, "just a few cracker crumbs."
"Tanks, again, Missus," he replies, brushing them off. "Vitout you telling, I vouldn't know dese tings."
A few moments later, he inquires again, "Do you mind I should ask a poisonal qvestion?"
"Not at all," she replies.
"I don't do vell vit the ladies. Do you tink I'm ugly?"
"You're quite presentable," she replies.
Smiling now, he exults, "Vat a relief. I vas alvays afraid to ask. Again, I got to tank you."
A few more moments pass and the lady speaks up. "Do you mind if I give you a bit of advice?"
"Soitenly! Listen, I'll take all de help what you got I vill take," he answers.
"Lose the Jewish accent." she replies. "You're black!!!"