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10. Assistant Rabbi ugly sweaters

9.  Inevitable coatroom black coat mix-ups

8.  Actual heated debates on halachic status of kids playing in snow

7.  Irrational relationship between inclement weather & subpar kiddushes

6.  Excessive cheering to the announcement: “The Eruv is Up”

5.  Associating  Soviet fur hats with religious Judaism

4.  Uggs envy

3.  The astonishing number of people in 2014 who actually own golashes

2.  Blackhatters showing up in blinding neon flourescent ski jackets

1. Lack of attendance doesn't shorten Rabbi's speech