Top Ten Ways You Know You are Frum, but still Cool

10. Your d'var Torahs end with "And it would be awesome, if this was zocheh to bring about the days of Moshiach because he rocks!"

9. When the opposite sex offers to shake hands, instead of saying "Sorry, I'm shomer", you comb your hand through the side of your hair and say "Psyche!"

8. At the seder, when we pour out some wine for the ten plagues, you mention the custom's reason is to "Pour out a little liquor" for Tupac and all "the homies" that died in Egypt

7. You can easily mix up the yeshivish and secular slang: For example, "Dude, that girl is sooo not shayach." "Damn, that Tisch was off the hizzy".

6. You use your IM name to give people chizuk: for example, "613theIkar", "AllMinHashamayim", "StayOnTheDerech"

5. Although you can't curse anymore, you use kosher substitutes, like "this is some flippin' bullspit"

4. You lament how, were it not for dina d'malchuta dina, you would be toking up all the time

3. Though you only listen to Jewish Music, you're still "keeping it real" by listening to Black Hattitude and Radical Rapping Rabbis

2. Your cellphone rings to the tune of Hava Nagila

1. You start a shuckling pit at the Yisroel Williger concert